Miranda Michalowski
Fever Dream
1.
I’m having that dream again,
the one where I’m locked inside a
shopping centre Kmart and can’t get out.
I’m tangled in the coat racks,
a few aisles down from the air fryers and
around the corner from the parrot pyjamas.
Women’s boots - 20% off.
And you’re the bored cashier,
mouth full of watermelon gum,
already shutting the metal gate.
To be fair, they don’t pay you nearly enough here.
You see me sitting on the squeaky floor
next to the blue inventor playset for boys
and the hot pink plastic kitchen set for girls.
I’m sitting there, the floor pulling at
my hand trying to suction me underground.
You see me, this strange ball of a girl
and you lock the gate
turn off all the lights
I go to switch the pink kettle on
and by some miracle, it works.
2.
I’m having that dream again,
the one where it’s Gilligan’s Island
- or is it Lord of the Flies?
Either way it’s just the two of us
and we’re running out of food.
We’re strangers and old lovers
and we met in the shipwreck.
I say we could build a treehouse and
you laugh like I’m a child and you’re
a woman who’s been places and one
of us should really listen more.
Too bad we both don’t know how to fish.
You say we should spell out letters
in the sand that say HELP US.
I say that only works in the movies but
you’ve already started on the H and the E.
Maybe HEL would be more accurate.
I catch you staring at my collarbone
and you look hungry but I’m not
sure in what way?
3.
I’m having that dream again,
the one where you’re Death,
but a gentle Death like in ‘The Book Thief’
and you’re carrying me in your
arms towards a deep red sky.
I’m having the dream where you’re
playing me in the biopic of my life
and the director in a beret keeps
shouting “Brilliant! Brilliant!”
but there’s something in your lip shape
that’s getting it all wrong.
I’m having the one where you hit me
with your motorbike and I say “thank you”
Where you’re a cat nuzzling up against my leg.
Where you’re gum on the bottom of my boot.
I wonder if you being in my dream
means that I’m in yours or if that’s
just a dumb thing I read on the internet.
I’m having that dream again,
the one where I’m locked inside a
shopping centre Kmart and can’t get out.
I’m tangled in the coat racks,
a few aisles down from the air fryers and
around the corner from the parrot pyjamas.
Women’s boots - 20% off.
And you’re the bored cashier,
mouth full of watermelon gum,
already shutting the metal gate.
To be fair, they don’t pay you nearly enough here.
You see me sitting on the squeaky floor
next to the blue inventor playset for boys
and the hot pink plastic kitchen set for girls.
I’m sitting there, the floor pulling at
my hand trying to suction me underground.
You see me, this strange ball of a girl
and you lock the gate
turn off all the lights
I go to switch the pink kettle on
and by some miracle, it works.
2.
I’m having that dream again,
the one where it’s Gilligan’s Island
- or is it Lord of the Flies?
Either way it’s just the two of us
and we’re running out of food.
We’re strangers and old lovers
and we met in the shipwreck.
I say we could build a treehouse and
you laugh like I’m a child and you’re
a woman who’s been places and one
of us should really listen more.
Too bad we both don’t know how to fish.
You say we should spell out letters
in the sand that say HELP US.
I say that only works in the movies but
you’ve already started on the H and the E.
Maybe HEL would be more accurate.
I catch you staring at my collarbone
and you look hungry but I’m not
sure in what way?
3.
I’m having that dream again,
the one where you’re Death,
but a gentle Death like in ‘The Book Thief’
and you’re carrying me in your
arms towards a deep red sky.
I’m having the dream where you’re
playing me in the biopic of my life
and the director in a beret keeps
shouting “Brilliant! Brilliant!”
but there’s something in your lip shape
that’s getting it all wrong.
I’m having the one where you hit me
with your motorbike and I say “thank you”
Where you’re a cat nuzzling up against my leg.
Where you’re gum on the bottom of my boot.
I wonder if you being in my dream
means that I’m in yours or if that’s
just a dumb thing I read on the internet.
Mirandą Michalowski (she/her) is a Sydney-based writer with a passion for queer and feminist stories, as well as all things funny and strange. With a focus on playwriting, Miranda just completed her Honours thesis on female coming-of-age in theatre, and is set to debut her comedy play ‘Saturday Girls’ in Sydney this year.
instagram: @miranda_mic
instagram: @miranda_mic